Not all heroes have a plan. Some have snacks.
The Procrastinator's Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse is your survival handbook for when the undead rise—and you're still scrolling TikTok in your pajama pants.
This isn't a guide for elite preppers or action movie stars. It's for the rest of us: the mildly motivated, chronically distracted, and emotionally dependent on hoodies. If you've ever thought, "I should get ready... tomorrow," this book gets you.
Inside, you'll find practical-ish wisdom like:
How to recognize a zombie outbreak without panic-buying beans
What to pack when you forgot to pack
Barricading your living room without ruining the vibe
Starting a survivor group (even if people exhaust you)
Using duct tape as a multi-tool and emotional crutch
Equal parts parody, guidebook, and oddly comforting hug, this book helps you face the end of the world with low expectations and high sarcasm. Whether you're planning a dramatic escape, fortifying your blanket fort, or just trying to avoid being zombie brunch, you'll find advice that's honest, weirdly relatable, and occasionally even useful.
Not all heroes have a plan. Some have snacks.
The Procrastinator's Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse is your survival handbook for when the undead rise—and you're still scrolling TikTok in your pajama pants.
This isn't a guide for elite preppers or action movie stars. It's for the rest of us: the mildly motivated, chronically distracted, and emotionally dependent on hoodies. If you've ever thought, "I should get ready... tomorrow," this book gets you.
Inside, you'll find practical-ish wisdom like:
How to recognize a zombie outbreak without panic-buying beans
What to pack when you forgot to pack
Barricading your living room without ruining the vibe
Starting a survivor group (even if people exhaust you)
Using duct tape as a multi-tool and emotional crutch
Equal parts parody, guidebook, and oddly comforting hug, this book helps you face the end of the world with low expectations and high sarcasm. Whether you're planning a dramatic escape, fortifying your blanket fort, or just trying to avoid being zombie brunch, you'll find advice that's honest, weirdly relatable, and occasionally even useful.
